Last night, as I was watching a video by Carrie Hope Fletcher entitled “Looking After Your Mental Health” where she openly talks about taking care of ourselves and our mental health, but, most importantly, I noticed that she raises an important point about the difficulty of seeking help and believing we are ‘worthy’ of help.
Before anything, I want to clarify that everyone, EVERYONE, is worthy of help. No one deserves to suffer in silence because you think that your pain is less important, less great than others. In her video, Carrie rightly states that “your mental health is as important as your physical health”. No more, no less, but AS important.
Everyone struggles with their mental health at some point or another in their life. It’s perfectly normal. It’s human.
But what’s not normal, what shouldn’t be normal, especially now, is people being stigmatized because of their mental health. It’s almost 2019 and we are still living in a society where asking for help, or even showing that you might need help, is considered as ‘weak’ or as a ‘shame’. It is not a ‘shame’ and it is definitely not a ‘weakness’. If you have a physical injury, you go to the hospital, you ask for help. It should be the same for your mental health. We all struggle but we don’t all need the same attention, the same care. And that’s alright. Some people need a bit more help than others and that should not be a shame.
Carrie also points out in her video that “asking for help is the stronger thing to do because it’s hard to admit you can’t handle something on your own” and I think that she’s right. There’s nothing harder and braver than recognizing you need help and that you won’t get better by yourself. It’s extremely difficult to come forward and tell someone that you are suffering, whether it’s to someone you know or not. And it’s even more difficult if you know that you’ll be rejected or shamed if you do so.
This is why the stigma around mental health needs to stop. Now. It prevents people from seeking the help they need, from reaching out. Otherwise, it’s only going to get worse. There is no other solution than asking for help. So we, as a society, need to learn how to take care of ourselves, to take care of each other; and instead of pulling someone down by casting them out as ‘weak’ or ‘embarrassing’, we should be pulling them up, helping them and supporting them. It’ll make us better people.
Besides, there will always be people to listen to you and to help you. If it’s not your family or friends, there are charities and organizations which are specifically set up to help you with your mental health. You can find some of them very easily through the Internet, as there are now many means to contact a support group: you can go see someone directly, or talk to them by telephone, text messages or even communicate with them through social media (The Buddy Project or Love is Louder on Twitter for example). Carrie also leaves useful links at the bottom of her video, urging her viewers to reach for help if they are struggling (samaritans.org; mind.org; or even the Wikipedia page of the worldwide suicide crisis numbers).
For those who may not know, Carrie Hope Fletcher, the author of the video, is mostly known for her career as a musical actress, having played in The Addams Family or more recently in Heathers; but she is also a published writer and a vlogger. As someone who is already constantly exposed to the media eye, she still remains very outspoken and honest towards her “fans”. She doesn’t hesitate to talk about herself; especially knowing she can help someone else by doing so. She wants to make her channel a “happy place”, something that people can watch when they’re having a bad day. She tries to be positive and to inspire people through her vlog and I personally think her channel is really amazing. As a musical theatre enthusiast, I was already a fan of hers but, watching this video, and her many others where she advocated body positivity as well as mental and physical health, I respect and admire her even more.
Likewise, in the video, she also addresses the fact that people have asked her how does she do to always be positive and cheerful. Well, as she tells her viewers, she’s not. No one can be, not all the time. She’s still human and she still struggles. And that’s alright. As long as she knows how to take care of herself and that she is surrounded by people who support her; that’s alright.
Because she’s not alone. And neither are you. If you are struggling, even a little, know that there’s always someone who wants to help you and listen to you. Even if you think that you have nothing to complain about or that you have everything to be happy, you still deserve help. Mental health is not a choice and cannot be controlled. So, as Carrie brilliantly says, “never think that your problems are too small and don’t deserve anyone’s time” or that “your problems don’t matter” because, as hard it is to realize it sometimes, it’s not true. Your problems matter. You matter.
You are worthy of help. You are worthy of love. Always remember that everyone needs someone. You are not alone.
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| Carrie Hope Fletcher (photo: Darren Bell) |
You can find Carrie’s video here: https://youtu.be/dADmGpZhFEo
PS: You can also check Carrie’s video “Punish Yourself Buff” where she talks about body positivity and how going to the gym should not be a way to punish your body but, on the contrary, to take care of your body and try to be more healthy. You can find this video here: https://youtu.be/soYZ2yzxEjM
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